USiqiu Edolobheni LaseSuihua, Esifundazweni saseHeilongjiang

Noma nini uma ngibona le ndima elandelayo yamazwi kaNkulunkulu, “Uma kade ulokhu wethembeke kakhulu, ungithanda kakhulu, kodwa uhlushwa ukugula, ubumpofu, kanye nokushiywa abangani nezihlobo zakho, noma uma ubekezelela noma yimaphi amanye amashwa ekuphileni, ingabe ukwethembeka kwakho nokungithanda kwakho kusazoqhubeka?” (“Inkinga Enkulu: Ukukhaphela (2)” encwadini ethi Izwi Livela Lisenyameni). ngizizwa ngingeneme neze—umuzwa othile wosizi uyangisibekela ngaphakathi bese inhliziyo yami izwakalisa isikhalo sayo esingenaphimbo: Nkulunkulu Wami othandekayo, ungavumela kanjani ukuba labo abathembekile Kuwena futhi abakuthandayo bahlangabezane namashwa anjena? Ngenxa yalokho, ngibe nenkinga kakhulu yokuqonda incazelo yomfowethu ovela ngenhla owathi, “Imfuno yokugcina eyafunwa nguNkulunkulu kumuntu ukuba abe nothando futhi nobuqotho.”

Kamuva nje, udade engangisebenzisana naye waba nesifo se-hyperthyroidism. Kwaya ngokuya, isimo sakhe safinyelela endaweni lapho kwakudingeka adle izidlo eziyisithupha ngosuku. Ngenxa yengcindezi yesifo, amandla akhe aya ngokuya ephela, wayesephila usuku nosuku nokucindezeleka, ubuthakathaka kanye nokukhathala. Umzimba wakhe wavele wangabe usakwazi ukwenza izifiso zakhe zokugcwalisa imisebenzi yakhe futhi ukugula kwakhe kwaya ngokuya kudlondlobala. Angikwazanga ukuqonda ukuthi kungani lokhu kwakwenzeka: “Lo dade wayeshiye umndeni wakhe nomsebenzi oholela kahle unanemihlomulo emihle ukuze azozinikela ekugcwaliseni imisebenzi yakhe futhi wayethembekile kakhulu. Kwenzeka kanjani ukuthi, phezu kwakho konke lokhu ayesekwenzile, athwaliswe iminjunju yalokhu kugula esikhundleni sezenzo zakhe ezinhle? …” Angizange ngizwakalise imizwa yami, kodwa inhliziyo yami yayigcwele ukuyaluza—njalo uma kukhona oqala le ndaba ngangivele ngiphelelwe yisineke.

Kungekudala nje emva kwalokho, mina nodadewethu lona sahlukana, kodwa angizange ngimkhohlwe. Ngolunye usuku, ngabuza umphathi wami ukuthi wayeqhuba kanjani lo dade. Umphathi wathi: “Ekuqaleni wayenesimo esibi kakhulu futhi enqaba ukubona umsebenzi kaNkulunkulu. Kamuva, waziphoqa ukulungisa isimo sakhe, wafuna inhloso kaNkulunkulu ngaphakathi kweminjunju yokugula. Ngokusizwa amazwi kaNkulunkulu, waqala ukuzazi nokubona ukuthi ubengenalo ukholo loqobo. Ngaphakathi okholweni lwakhe kwakusekhona lowaya muzwa “wokushintshiselana,” esenesifiso sokuzuza izibusiso ngenxa yokholo lwakhe kuNkulunkulu. Waphinde wabona ezinye izinhlobo eziningi zokuhlubuka ngaphakathi kuyena. Uthe uma esezibonile lezi zinto ngaye, impilo yakhe yaba ngcono kakhulu. Uyalulama usuku nosuku, usebuyele ezidlweni ezintathu ngosuku futhi isimo sakhe singcono kakhulu. Useyakwazi nokulekelela odade nabafowabo bekhaya elimsingethe ukuba balungise izimo zabo….” Ngithe uma ngizwa lezi zindaba ezinhle, ngethuka ngempela. Ngangicabange ukuthi ukuhlaselwa ukugula kuyomyethisa udade lo futhi kumdalele ukuhlupheka okukhulu. Edlavazwe ukugula, ngangikholwa ukuthi ubukhona bakhe endleleni eya phambili kwakuyoncipha. Ngangiye ngasola nokuthi ngeke akwazi ukuqhubeka. Namuhla, ngibheke nesimo sangokoqobo sesimo sakhe, ngasala nginkemile. Akagcinanga nje ngokungaphelelwa ukholo, kodwa, ngokucwengwa ukugula kwakhe, wayegcine esewuqonda umsebenzi kaNkulunkulu wakwazi nokubona ukonakala kwakhe. Wayefunde empilweni yakhe wakwazi nokuphucula impilo yakhe. Ingabe lokhu kugula kwakungekona ukubonakalisa kukaNkulunkulu uthando Lwakhe lweqiniso kanye nensindiso yangokoqobo yomuntu?

Kamuva, ngafunda indima elandelayo ekuhlanganyeleni kwabantu: “Inombolo 5: ‘Uma kade ulokhu wethembeke kakhulu, ungithanda kakhulu, kodwa uhlushwa ukugula, ubumpofu, kanye nokushiywa abangani nezihlobo zakho, noma uma ubekezelela noma yimaphi amanye amashwa ekuphileni, ingabe ukwethembeka kwakho nokungithanda kwakho kusazoqhubeka?’ (“Inkinga Enkulu: Ukukhaphela (2)” encwadini ethi Izwi Livela Lisenyameni). Lesi sidingo asiyiso isivivinyo esincane esintwini. … Ukwethembeka nokuthanda uNkulunkulu kwakhelwe phezu kwasiphi isisekelo? Kungakhonjiswa kanjani ukuthi umuntu ngempela unokwethembeka kuNkulunkulu? Kungakhonjiswa kanjani ukuthi umuntu unalo ngempela uthando lukaNkulunkulu? Lokhu kudinga ukuqinisekiswa ngokuvivinywa nokucwengisiswa. … Lapho uhlangana nalolu hlobo lokuvivinywa, inhloso yokuqala kaNkulunkulu ukukuveza ukuze abone ukuthi ukuthi ukwethembeka nothando lwakho kuyiqiniso yini. Inhloso yakhe yesibili ukukuhlanza, ngoba kukhona ukungcola ekwethembekeni nasothandweni lwakho. Uma ukwazi lokhu kungcola, okwambulwayo lapho uhlangana nokuvivinywa okunhlobonhlobo, khona-ke kuyohlanzwa kuwe. Uma abantu benokwethembeka nothando lweqiniso kuNkulunkulu, khona-ke ngisho bangehlelwa yini futhi noma bangahlangana naluphi uhlobo lokuvivinywa, ngeke bawe, kodwa kunalokho bayoqhubeka bathembeke futhi babe nothando kuNkulunkulu ngaphandle kokungabaza. Kulabo abanokwethembeka nothando okunokungcola nesifiso sokuzuza okuthile njengomvuzo, ngeke kube lula ukuma baqine lapho izivivinyo zehlela kubo, futhi bayoba sengcupheni yokuwa. Abantu abanjalo bayokwambulwa kalula, ngeke kube njalo?” “Singasindiswa Kuphela Ngokwanelisa Izidingo Zokugcina ZikaNkulunkulu” embhalweni othi Izintshumayelo Nokuhlanganyela II). Kungemva kokufunda le ndima kuphela yokuhlanganyela nabazalwane lapho ngabona khona ukuthi selokhu ngangehlulela umsebenzi kaNkulunkulu ngokucabanga kwami kwenyama. Ngakholwa ngokuyiphutha ukuthi uthando lukaNkulunkulu luhamba nezipho eziningi zomusa nesiqiniseko senjabulo yenyama nokuthula. Angikaze ngicabange ukuthi ukuhlupheka kuyindlela yesibusiso sikaNkulunkulu. Kungemva kokubona lesi sehlakalo sikadadewethu, lapho ngabona khona ukuthi ukucwengwa ngokuhlushwa ngukubonakaliswa koqobo kothando lukaNkulunkulu. UNkulunkulu udala izimo ezithile bese eletha amashwa phezu kwabantu Bakhe—ingabe ngokugula emzimbeni, izinkinga zezimali, noma nanoma yiziphi ezinye izinkinga—hhayi ngenhloso embi kodwa ngenxa yothando Lwakhe nomusa. Ukuze abhekane nenkohlakalo nokusilela komuntu, uNkulunkulu udala zonke izinhlobo zezimo zokumlinga nokumcwenga. Usebenza ngalokhu kuhlupheka ukuze ahlanze, aguqule futhi anikeze impilo kumuntu. Yize noma inyama yomuntu kufanele ibhekane nobunzima obukhulu kulo mgudu wokucwengwa, okungabukwa njengebhadi noma izinto ezimbi, izinhloso nemibono emibi, izifiso ezingenamqondo, nezinjongo ezingalungile zokufuna umuntu anazo ekukholweni kwakhe kuNkulunkulu ukuze azazi, futhi abe nobudlelwane obusondele kobujwayelekile ukuze akwazi ukutshala nokukhuthaza uthando lukaNkulunkulu enhliziyweni yakhe. Imihlomulo enjengaleyo ayitholakali ngokuba nempilo elula nemnandi. Lapho umuntu esezitholile izifundo ezivela ekuhlushweni yizilingo zakhe bese ebukisisa emuva endleleni ayihambile, ekugcineni uyaqonda ukuthi izahlulelo zikaNkulunkulu nokusola, ukushaya Kwakhe kanye nokulungisa konke kwakufakwe uthando lukaNkulunkulu olungenamkhawulo. Uthando lukaNkulunkulu alukhona nje kuphela ukondla nokuba nesihawu. Akuve kumayelena nokupha izinto eziphathekayo kuphela, kodwa futhi nokucwenga okubanga usizi, ukushaya nokulungisa.

Nkulunkulu othandekayo, ngiyabonga ngokusebenzisa zonke izinto ezingizungezile ukuze ulungise indlela yami engasile nephambukayo yokucabanga futhi ungivumele ngibone ukuthi yize noma uthando Lwakho lungahambisani nemicabango yethu, izibonakaliso zalo kuhlezi kuhloswe ngazo ukusithuthukisa nokusisindisa. Izenzo Zakho zothando zihlala njalo zifakwe ukusebenza kwenhliziyo Yakho kanye nobuhlakani obungenakulinganiswa. Ngiphinde ngabona ukuthi ngaphambilini bengingaqondi ukuthi uthando Lwakho imvama luye lufihlwe phakathi kwezimo ezithile. Nkulunkulu othandekayo, ngenxa yothando Lwakho owabelana ngalo nesintu, ngikunika udumo nokubonga! Ngethemba futhi nokuthi ngelinye ilanga nami ngiyothola lolu hlobo lothando. Uma lolu thando lungase nami lungifikele, ngiyafunga ukuba ngamukele noma ukuhlupheka okungakanani, ukuze ngikwazi ukuzwa futhi ngifakaze ngothando Lwakho.